Hi.:)

Welcome to my blog for 2007!!!




January 1, 2008

HaPpY NeW YeAr!!! :)

Wanna see some fireworks?:D
I'm guessing most anyone who reads this is in U.S.A. And you think you've seen fireworks. Ha ha. You've never seen anything like this.
In Denmark, fireworks are legal from the first of December to the 5th of January. (That's what I read in the news.) That's right, any idiot can go buy 'em. Hee hee. Well...I think you have to be at least 16 for the rockets and big things. And I don't remember ever seeing any fireworks being sold here except for after Christmas, the last week of December.
There's stuff going off occasionally in the days before New Year's Eve. On the last day of the year, people start lighting stuff after dark. Not much, just some of the little stuff here and there. It builds up to midnight. After midnight everything goes completely cRaZy!! The whole country sounds like a war zone. The sky explodes all over in different colors. It's seriously wild!
I live in a small town. There's only around 40,000 people here. (Although it's actually the 20th largest town or city in Denmark.) So, you might guess one wouldn't see much. You'd be ridiculously wrong!:P
I taped about 30 minutes. I edited this down to just over 22 minutes. (I took out seconds of black screen here and there, some bits of out of focus stuff, some bits of the camera moving too much and some little parts where not much was going on.)
This is what happens in a small town after midnight to celebrate the new year. Watch and be amazed.:) I taped this from my balcony...





December 26, 2007

In The News Today: Found Dead Man In The Yard

A resident on Bryggervej (name of a street) in Helsinge (name of a town), Denmark, got a rough start on Christmas day looking out the window into the yard and seeing a man lying lifeless on his back in the grass.
The resident used the phone after examining the man who was stiff and cold.
An ambulance came quickly but there was nothing that could be done. The man was dead. He was wearing thin clothes when he was found. (The temperature at night this time of year in Denmark is usually in the 30's.) There is not yet any information about the man's age or if there is anything suspicious about his death.

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I saw the headline and laughed.:D
Can you imagine that, looking out the window and seeing some dead dude in your yard?:/ I'd be thinking, like, oh no. No, no, no. I don't want it!! Get it the f*** out of here!!!:S
Imagine you have to make that call and be, like, uh, there's a dead man in my yard. But, listen, really, I didn't have anything to do with it!:S And the police are gonna come and ask all these questions, who is he, do you know him, what's he doing here, have you ever seen him before, etc.
I'm sure the thought would occur to me, like, hey, um, maybe I could, you know, sort of drag dude off to the neighbor's yard and leave the body there!;) :) :D Let them deal with it! I don't want it!!
Who knows, maybe the neighbor gets the same idea and passes the body off further down the street. And so on and so on. And I'd hope they keep that thing moving away from me! Go ahead and keep it moving past state lines.:) And...yeah, if it gets past the border to another country, I'm down with that!:D LOL.
The other idea that came to me right away was, like, put a blanket over it and be, like, f*** it, it's Christmas! I can't deal with this sh*t now. I'll take care of it tomorrow.:P (Or, no, wait, not a blanket. Hell, no! It's gotta be an old sheet or a cheap tarp or something I can throw out after.;) Do you think someone could do that, just keep putting it off. Of course, by then, there's plenty of time to think up more possibilities and options, like...does he have any cash? A ring? A gold tooth? Somethin'? Anything?:P Finally, it's been a week or two and it's too late to call and you have to bury it. Hmmm, maybe somewhere else. Yeah, definitely bury that thing somewhere else! Well, maybe someone could do that, not me. (Well...I mean, okay, I'd prob'ly check for cash at least.:P ) I'd want that thing gone immediately. I'd want it the f*** out of my yard!!!
Hmmmm...if one had the patience, maybe take a picture, print a bunch of copies, start hanging 'em around the neighborhood. "Do you know him? Does this man belong to you? Please claim him. Call me." LOL.
What a story to tell everyone, huh. Christmas day and all, I found a dead body in my yard!:S
And next Christmas...be looking out the window checking for bodies and getting that nice sigh of relief. And then checking the window ten minutes later just to make sure. Whew! No dead bodies this year. Yay!! It's gonna be a good Christmas!!!!:D




December 19, 2007

I Got A New Computer Monitor!! :)

My old monitor never worked right. And the really ridiculous thing is I've had it about 3 years! I got it the same time I got my first computer so I wasn't experienced with how things are supposed to look on a computer monitor. I hadn't used computers much 'til I got one. I had a suspicion but it was only earlier this year I discovered for sure something was definitely wrong with the monitor.
There was a lightning storm one night and my computer went out. I decided I better not use it anymore that night just to be safe but I wanted to turn it back on just to make sure it still worked and everything was okay. Yeah, it was fine. And...my monitor suddenly showed things differently! In a good way. Everything was brighter and there were more colors. I always had a feeling the colors didn't show right. Some colors just seemed to be missing, like green and yellow and there were never any bright colors. Everything was always dull and dark. I was always pushing at the brightness and contrast trying to bring the levels up but they just wouldn't go up anymore. After the storm that night, it seemed all the colors were actually there and the brightness was at least acceptable. I excitedly thought, "This is the way it's supposed to be!"
Anyway, after that night, sometimes it showed right when I turned it on, sometimes not. Sometimes, after a half hour or hour, suddenly the screen would change and show things right. Sometimes not. More and more it just wouldn't show things right at all. It was very frustrating never knowing how or if or when it would work right that day. Sure, I tried stuff like banging on it, opening it up looking for a loose connection, adjusting the cable. Nothing helped.
I had been planning to get a new one. When I got the loan for my TV, I also got enough for a monitor too but I was short on cash for food and I had seen some bracelets on eBay I wanted. I didn't know if the bracelets would be around later, but I knew the monitor would. So, I waited on the monitor 'til I got paid again. That would be my Christmas present to myself.:)
Okay, to try and make this shorter than my new TV story:P...I got a Samsung monitor too, a 19". It's a little bigger than my old one, the screen anyway! My old one was the big old clunky picture tube style kind and I haven't even seen those being sold anywhere for the last couple years or so. I finally got a flatscreen monitor!:D
I set it up and took a look and was, like, totally blown away absolutely shocked over how much difference there was!!!! Good holy mother of God!!! First of all, the brightness was...totally outrageously freakin' wild!! It has several presets for brightness and I keep it on the darkest one and it's still worlds brighter than my old monitor!! I can actually move this one back to the edge of the table, away from my face and see everything perfectly! In fact, I have to move this one out and away from my eyes, it's so bright. And the colors...oh my God! More colors than I ever imagined possible!!:) And the sharpness and detail I can see in everything now.......seriously light years and universes away from my old monitor!!!!
Then I got into thinking what a total piece of f***ed up sh*t my old monitor is! The difference is astounding! Here it is 2 weeks later and I'm still blown away.
Now, the reason it took so long for me to add this entry to my blog is...2 weeks ago was the first time I saw my site on a different monitor. It was the first time I saw any of my pictures or videos on a different monitor and everything was so wildly different! Like, I had edited and adjusted all my pictures to look as good as possible on the old monitor and this whole time i was completely comfortable and confident that's the way everyone else saw them too. Ha ha. I was so wrong!!! I kinda freaked and realized I had a lot of work to do. I had to go through all my pictures, readjust them and replace them. That's what I was spending time on. I finally got it all done.
As for the videos...wOw! They look so much better.:) Before, I thought some of 'em were just too dark to be anything really worth showing. I always thought it was sooo bizarre how my pictures look great on my cell phone and my videos look great on my camera but when I put them on my computer...suddenly everything was so dark and colorless. And it was so weird how pictures printed on my printer never looked like what I saw on the screen. Everything came out of the printer so much brighter and with so much more color! I just thought that was just how it was for everyone. This is my first computer, my first printer. I had no other experiences to compare anything to. And now...what I see on screen is how the picture prints out and what I see on my camera matches what I see on the computer! Now everything makes sense!!!:D
I'm soOoOo hApPy with my new monitor!!!!:)




November 25, 2007

I Got A New TV!!! :o)

Part 1: Wednesday, Nov.7
My Old TV Is Dead :(

I guess I can't complain since I didn't even pay for my old TV. An ex-girlfriend bought it used from someone at her work and left it to me when she moved. It was a Nokia, now 11 years old and either a 28" or a 29". I'm not sure about the size since it didn't say on the manual and when manufacturers talk about size, it's always something between the actual viewing area and the total size of the TV. So, like, how do you even know when your measure it?!:/ And it was the old picture tube style. Huge and heavy.
I'd been having problems with it for quite awhile. And just the last months before it died, the problems were getting worse. The last few weeks, I frequently had to turn it on and off several times to get it to turn on at all. Text TV only worked half the time. Occasionally, it would make scary loud popping noises and flashed and stuff. Like, damn, I was missing the good ol' days when it would just make little tiny sparks sometimes in the back and text TV was slow. LOL.
I knew one day it would just go poof and die. But...as long as it worked, I wasn't gonna get another one. I didn't have the money for that. But...yeah, on a Wednesday night, earlier this month, I tried to turn my TV on and it kinda went snap crackle pop poof real loud. And then...it was dead.:S
I figured when it came time to get a new TV, I wanted one at least the same size, hopefully bigger. And, like, hey, as long as I'm gettin' one, it's time to move up to a flatscreen! I think I read somewhere they don't even make the old picture tube TV's anymore. I did some window shopping on the internet that night. And I'd been watching sale prices in the local stores for weeks. I was planning to get a 32". I hadn't exactly decided for sure which brand or model though.
I had a general feeling I'd just get the cheapest thing I could find. TV's have been going on sale every week lately. Maybe it's always been like that. I just noticed lately though. I looked on the net to see what people say about getting cheap TV's. Most of the comments I read were people saying don't get the cheap brands. One person wrote something about one of the brands I was thinking of getting. He said he got it because of the price, came home, tried it and took it back after 2 days saying the picture was kinda blurry on some channels. He got a name brand instead and said he was very happy with that one. So, I decided not to get a TV from some company I never heard of before. I decided I'd get something I knew would be good. Of course, Sony is a good choice (even though I have read a few surprisingly negative comments about Sony when I was looking on the net that night) and my fav choice when I got my stereo but...Sony is also expensive. There are other brands that are just as good or better for less. Like Samsung or JVC. I decided on Samsung since, in my experience, that is one of the top most reliable manufacturers. (Some comments I've read recently say it's the best brand. And I've never seen one negative comment about Samsung.) I knew if I got a Samsung, I would not be disappointed. (I remember years ago thinking...when I get a new TV, I'd prob'ly get a Sony if I had lots of money to spend. If not, I'd get a Samsung.)
Money. Didn't have it. And prices are kinda wild here. I looked around on the net, which I've found is always cheaper than the local stores, compared prices and decided on the model I wanted. It was a little over a $1000. And for a 32" here, that's cheap. There's only a few brands cheaper than that. But my only chance of getting the money (without doing anything illegal;) was getting a loan. I'm still paying off my computer and the place I loaned from occasionally sends something in the mail sayng I can loan more anytime if I want. And that's what I figured I'd do if anything happened to the TV. Still though, they wanted me to fill out a form with all kinds of info and wait for an answer. I calculated numbers for over an hour deciding how much to lie about my income. They want before tax and after tax amounts and I wanted to be sure it looked right. Hee hee.:P
Sounds easy enough, get a loan, order the TV, should have it in a few days, right? Ha ha ha. Oh Lordy, troubles and problems...
First, earlier that day, I had been to the bank about getting a new Visa card. I think I should've been allowed to keep my old one 'til I got the new one but the lady I spoke to took it. I didn't see a problem with that at the time since I was broke and don't use my Visa much anyway. (I like cash. Helps keep me grounded and feel how much I'm spending.;) Sure, of course...that has to be the day I come home and my TV goes poof.:S Not a good start on getting a new one.
On the loan application, they ask if you have a credit card and if so to write the number. I could've said I didn't have one. But I was guessing they'd take that as a good sign if you have a card. And I bet they wanna check the card number just to see that it's good. I figured it would look a whole lot better for me getting the loan if I had a card number to give them. So, I decided to wait 'til I got my new card. Could be a couple days. Could be a week. But I decided to wait.
Two days later, thank God, I got my new card. Yay! Then I could fill in the application and get my loan and order a TV and it should only be a few days or week at most, right? Ha ha ha.
Well, I carefully filled out the application on a Friday, totally lied my ass off about my income (and having a car) and sent it in. Did it over the net. I got an immediate answer. It was yes!!:D Okay, fantastic! That's the part I was most worried about. Only...I don't get the money so quick as I was hoping. They have to send me a paper to sign, I sign it, send it back and when they have it signed then they'll transfer money to my account. Or send a check. I figured transferring money to an account would be faster than waiting for a check so that's what I picked.
I got the paper in the mail to sign on the following Monday. I signed it and mailed it back. Then waited for the money. And waited. And I'm thinking, like, this waiting stuff is not good.:/ I was already behind on my TV watching before it went dead! I have lots of movies ready on my computer to be put on disc plus discs I haven't watched yet plus my video tapes were pretty much full. F***!!! (And, yes, I still have a VCR. I did finally buy a DVD player a few months ago but it only plays, not records. I'll get a recordable one next year. And it's a good thing I got the cheapie player first! Now I know what kinds of discs I need it to play!! I wouldn't have gotten that one if I understood it will only play recordable CD's and store bought DVD's, of course, but not recordable DVD's. Sigh.) That Thursday came around. Still no money in my account. I was about to call but looked on my copy of the contract first to see if that said anything about how long it takes. There is a sentence in there about thow they expect it will take 5 days "from this date". Uh huh. I guessed that meant 5 working days from after they get the signed paper. In other words, one week. Sigh. I was very impatient (well, for me, I felt very impatient;) but I decided to wait one more day before I called.
The next day, on a Friday, I was just planning to check my account before I called the loan place and there it was! The money was there in my account! Finally!!:) Now altogether 9 days after my TV went poof, I finally had the money to get a new TV!
I ordered my new TV (from Pixmania.com, if you're curious) and saw something there saying I should get it within 3 days after it gets sent. Okay, I'm gonna assume they mean working days. So...prob'ly Wednesday this week. I got an e-mail confirmation of my order and I figured the next day I'd get an e-mail saying it was sent. Only...didn't get an e-mail about that. Not Sunday either. And when I didn't get anything on Monday, I was worried it hadn't been sent and I wouldn't get it this week at all.:( Then...I remembered I didn't update my e-mail address with them because they send a lot of junk mail. Like, oh yeah! Duh. So, I checked my oldest e-mail address and yep, it got sent Saturday. Yay! Maybe I would get it Wednesday.

Part 2: Wednesday, Nov. 21
My New TV Is F***ing Amazing! :) :D

I came home from shopping, ate some cake and read my weekly TV guide/celeb gossip magazine. And then fell asleep on the couch. (I only got, like, 3 hours sleep the night before. Plus, hey, vodka and shopping go well together.:P ) Then I woke up and it was dark. And I wanted to turn on the TV. But...doesn't work. And then I started thinking about how it had been 3 weeks with no TV. It had only been 2 actually but...somehow by then I was totally sure it had been 3 weeks! And I was out of space on my tapes to record stuff. I was already recording over stuff I hadn't seen yet.
I was looking out the window watching every car that drove by, hoping maybe I'd see the mail truck. And I was so sad. I was wondering if I'd start to cry. And then...after sitting there looking out the window for 40 minutes or more, I was pissed. WHERE'S MY TV???!!!!
So, I gave up hope on getting it that day and went to the kitchen to figure out what's for dinner. I opened the refrigerator and was either looking or just got something out when I saw a postal truck out the kitchen window! Like...holy sh*t, maybe this is it!!!:)
I'm just watching out the window. The truck stops at a building across the street. Darn. The guy gets out and takes a package in there. Then, I'm thinking...does he come here next maybe? Is my TV in that truck? If it is, will he come here next or drive around delivering to all the other apartment buildings here first. So, I wait. And I wait.
Then he comes back out, opens the back of the truck and pulls out this big box. Like, hey! Is that my TV?! Then he starts bringing the box towards my building!:) Holy cow! And when I see him get closer, I was sure that was it!!!:D And I smiled excitedly, my eyes lit up, I ran from my kitchen to the living room and back again and then stepped into the hallway. I smiled and jumped up and down!:P :D I waved my arms and whispered, "Yes! Yes!! Yes!!!" LOL.
I was tempted to open my door, go run down the stairs as he's coming up and say, "Hi!!!" LOL. But I didn't. I did my best to control myself and wait so he can find my door, see my name there and ring the bell. And then he did.......riiiing.
I waited a few seconds. 'Cause I don't wanna look like a weirdo freakoid ripping open the door before his finger even leaves the doorbell button. And I open the door trying to look calm and casual. I think I was smiling though.:) And he says he has a package for me.
I say, "Yeah!" sounding more excited than I intended and I was trying not to smile but I knew I was. So, I sign for it. He picks it up and it looks like he intends to walk in, sort of sliding it and set it down inside for me. I waited 'til he slid it halfway through the door and I grabbed it excitedly and said, "Thanks!" He says have a good night or something and leaves.
Hee hee. I get the box in my living room. It's a big box but skinny. And I'm thinking it looks too big a box for a 32" TV. I'm dying to open it and see the actual screen! Hee hee. Well, I grabbed a pen to slice the tape with. I get it open and take all the extra stuff out and then the TV. And I'm thinking, like, that's it?!
It looked a little smaller than I imagined it would be. And, oh my God, it's so skinny! I've never had a flatscreen TV. And I measured the size of the screen compared to my old TV. Well, it's a good deal wider but it's also a little shorter.
Anyway, so I figured out how to put the stand on. And I put my TV on my TV table and sat on the couch to get an idea how big the screen looks and how the design looks. Yeah, the screen is bigger!:) And the design is very f***ing cool!!!! I hadn't even turned it on yet and I was thinking, oh my God, this is the coolest f***ing thing I have in my whole apartment!!!!!!!:D LOL. It's just sooo f***ing beautiful!!!!!!!!!! LOL.
I was too excited to sit. I stood up, grabbed the manual, wandered off and stood in the kitchen looking through it. I was kinda thinking I should start dinner but...looking through the manual was taking all my attention. I knew programming it was gonna be quite a bit different from my old TV. I wanted to get a sense of how hard that would be and what all this TV can do! Oh my God, it seemed like there was so much to read! (Well, prob'ly mostly 'cause the manual is so thick. But that's only because it's divided into sections saying the same thing in a whole bunch of different languages.)
Anyway...I got halfway or so through the manual and couldn't wait anymore. I read over the first few pages again, went back to the living room and turned it on. Holy f***ing sh*t, the menu is like using a computer! It's way different from my old TV, that's for sure! It took me awhile to figure out the menu and get used to how to work it. And I knew programming all the channels was gonna take forever the first time. But...I did it! It took me over 3 hours to do it and check out the menu and see what choices there are and get a general idea what can be programmed and all that. But......yeah, I did it! I'm fairly used to how it works now. After I got done with that, I needed a break and finally went to the kitchen to make dinner and eat before I really checked it out or watched anything.
The picture...seriously, oh my God!!! All the channels look better and some channels are sooo clear and crisp and clean and sharp and beautiful...I'm amazed!! At one point, I was looking at the screen in total awe, my jaw dropped and I whispered to myself, "Holy mother fucking shit!!!!" LOL. This TV so kicks ass!!!!!!!!!!:D And the picture is quite a bit bigger than on my old TV. The picture on this one totally fills up the screen. On my old TV...watching widescreen programs or movies, it didn't fill the screen. I lost several inches off the top and bottom. But on this TV...WOW!!!!!!! And it has a whole bunch of stuff I still haven't gotten around to checking out yet, like, for example, it can show 2 channels at once, it has several sound settings, I could hook my computer to it, it has a sleep timer, it can be programmed to turn on or off. It picked up an extra channel I don't even think I'm supposed to have. And it has live freeze frame. Hee hee. And when I freeze on something I recorded...dude! Way cool!! This is the greatest f***ing TV I ever had!!!!!!!!!! LOL. I'm in love with it!!!!!!!:o)
So, yeah, um, to make a long story short (ha ha ha :P ), yep, gots a new TV. Luvs it!!:)




November 16, 2007

The Epilating Adventures Continue

If you've read the last two entries, then you know I got an epilator a couple weeks ago.
Last time I wrote, things were looking up. But now...I feel like my body is doing it's best to revolt against being epilated. Yesterday, I noticed my chest and stomach felt stubbly all over. And new hair was visible and coming up not just here and there but all over! Sigh. I had to go back to the beginning head on my epilator. And it hurt. My skin got red and bumpy in places. A little blood. Like, damn, I thought all that was over. And today! Like, holy sh*t, I'm looking at myself and wondering where did all that hair come from?!:S There was more. Back to the beginning head again and back to my doing my chest, stomach and crotch. Sigh.
I'm still pondering this whole epilating thing. Is it worth it? Does it get easier and faster than shaving? 'Cause I gotta go over those areas about every other day. And I would give it up, I would go back to shaving except...I want my skin smooth so bad! And every time after I've gone over it again with the epilator, it does look and feel slightly smoother than the time before. Maybe, just maybe, it will get easier and less time consuming.
As for my legs, they were sooo smooth after the first time I did 'em. And, so far, there hasn't been much of a problem with hair coming back. I've gone over my legs a few times since and it wasn't a big deal. It was quick and not painful except high up on the inner thigh area, especially near the crotch!:S My legs still look really great but...I do feel a slight stubble all over from new hair about to come up. My legs feel kinda like I shaved several hours ago. Only, not quite as bad as that. It seems there's less new hair coming up then if I had shaved.
I get thoughts like, my body is laughing at me and saying ha ha, you think you can epilate me?! Ha ha ha. It ain't gonna happen. No way.
I think about hair follicles and hair under the skin that hasn't quite come out yet and...it's kinda yucky and gross. Like...hair under my skin?!!:/ Gross! Get it out. I don't need it there. Yuck! I wish I could choose where I want it to be and where I don't need it. From the neck down, I'd like everything totally completely gone except for on my arms. I don't mind using the hair clipper on my arms to keep my arm hair real short. That doesn't take so long. It's only about every 10 days or every other week I do that. All the rest of my body hair, from the neck down, I want gone! Like, wow, that might save me hours a week.
Anyway, well...maybe, hopefully, my skin will look smoother on camera for my videos.:) And I'm thinking I should record myself again real soon. Maybe this weekend. Although, it's kinda like...masturbating on cam is getting boring. I've been catching myself in the mirror sometimes and thinking I'm kinda hot!:D LOL. Like, holy sh*t, I need some more pictures of me!! My body is actually very sexy sometimes. I should be recorded having sex!!!:D I'd love to get down with girls or I'm ready to be a sexy submissive sweet smooth slut for guys and get used and fUcKeD and spermed over!:P :D LOL.
Oh my God, the things I would do...:)...all in the hopes of someone watching me and thinking I'm sExY...




November 9, 2007

More Adventures With My New Epilator

I epilated my legs!:)
It was only a week ago I used an epilator for the first time on my chest. And stomach. And crotch. Seems like it's been longer 'cause I've used it a few times on those areas since then. And, it seems, yeah, the first time is totally freakin' torturously wild but after that...it's really not bad.:) No more rash. No more bleeding. Doesn't even hurt that much. I can handle it now. It's not so scary to use it anymore.
I was expecting my chest to feel a little smoother after the first time though. There was still a bit of a stubble feel there last week. Not as much as after shaving. I guess what I felt was new hair about to come up. And I was a little surprised how quickly new hair came up. Not all over though, just a little bit sprouting out here and there which is why I went over everything quickly a few times since. It's quite noticeably smoother this week. Not quite super smooth. But I imagine if I keep using it, my skin will get smoother. So far, considering all the time I've spent on it, it's way more time consuming than shaving but it is smoother and I'm guessing, within the next few weeks, my skin will get even more smooth and it will take less time than shaving.:)
Yesterday, I started on my legs. First impression...not bad! I mean, wow, it didn't hurt anything at all like doing my chest for the first time. Totally different experience. I started on my lower legs. It got a little uncomfortable around the knees. Things went just fine until I got to my inner thighs. Ouch!!! That hurt. And I got the red bumpy rash thing on that area. And way up on the inner thigh, doing the so called bikini line area...SH*T!!!! That part was nOt fun.:S
Guys have a lOt of hair! So, I've been buzzing away on my legs for hours. Pretty much got it done yesterday but used the epilator for maybe an hour on my legs today to finish it off and get things perfect. Again, not bad except for the inner thighs and bikini line area. Way up there near the crotch...F***! A little blood around there. And the red bumpy rash thing blazed up. But it's done now and keeping it up shouldn't be at all so time consuming and hard on the skin.
I'll admit, a few times today, I was thinking, "Have I lost my mind?":P And also wondering if I keep this up, will I ever be brave enough to wear shorts in public again??! I did some rethinking (is that a word?!:P ) on this whole epilating idea. Well, so far, this is still new to me and I'm just trying it out and seeing how it goes. I'll probably keep it up though since, for one thing, wearing clothes is so comfortable when your skin is smooth!:) And, like, oh my God, wOw, my legs have never been smoother.:) :D
I know what turns me on when I look at girls.;) I know what I like to see and the closer I can get to looking like that, the more happy I am looking at myself. I know I'll never look right wearing a dress or wearing lots of make-up but I can't imagine how anyone could be attracted to a hairy chest or hairy legs.:/ I can't stand myself that way. I can't live like that. It bothers me that much. It doesn't look right and doesn't feel right at all to me. Being smooth, now that feels so right to me!:D And it looks so sooo nice and sexy.:) It's what I want and it makes me feel comfortable and happy about myself.:)




November 2, 2007

I Got My First Epilator

So, how many weird things can I say or do before I'm just too weird?:P Or is it just, like, way too entirely late to even be thinking of that?:)
I've been planning for years to get an epilator and try that out. Basically, mostly, for my legs 'cause I feel most comfortable when they're smooth. (How am I doing on the weirdometer, is it past max? Did I break it yet?) This month and next month I'm not completely drowned in bills, so I can get a couple things I've been wanting. I've been watching prices on epilators and there was a really nice one on sale so I got it!:D It's a Braun Silk-épil 5285. Maybe you're familiar with some of the models. I really like the design and the color. It's blue.:) And I know it's supposed to be one of the best ones available, if not the best one.;)
I shaved my legs recently, so it's too soon to try the epilator on my legs. I had been wondering if I could do my chest and stomach with one. Yesterday, I turned it on intending to use it but...it's much louder than I thought it would be.:S And I was really unsure about what it would do when I put it to my skin. The noise it makes is scary. I could almost imagine how tiny blades would immediately shred up my skin or something.:S I was almost too scared to try it. LOL.
I pressed it on my chest a couple times real quick. It didn't shred me open or anything, so then I tried to actually use it on a tiny area of my chest to see how much it hurt and how well it works. Well, it hurt! And more than I hoped or expected.:/ And it seemed to go kinda slow. I really had doubts about whether I could do my whole chest with it. Somehow, I convinced myself to do it figuring maybe I'd get used to it. At some points one leg or the other would be trembling and I'd feel sweat start to trickle down. Then I did my stomach. Then my crotch. (Which really takes determination and mind power!) And...wOw, the whole thing was totally crazy.:S Like, f***!! It hurts!!! I'm so thankful for the different heads to use and different speeds. That helps a lot. And I kept thinkin' it's only the first time it's so bad, right? After that, it gets easier, doesn't it? 'Cause there's no way in freakin' hell I'm goin' through that every week!!!! It should almost be like some kind of minor surgery you get put to sleep for. Then you wake up, and it's done.:P After it was over, for the rest of the day, I had what looked like some wild awful red bumpy rash.
Today, I did some touch-up work. Got everything perfect. And my skin is looking much better today, but still a little red and sensitive and bumpy looking in some small areas. Like, especially my crotch. But...hmmm, there's a comfortable smooth feel to my skin. Kinda like just after shaving. Except, after I shave, that smooth feeling is gone within a half day. Right now, it's a day and half since I first used the epilator and I still have that smooth comfortable feel. I hate all the work it took to get it that way but...the feeling I have now is nice.:) The real test will be to see how long it lasts and how much work it is to keep it smooth.
I'm pretty much epilated out.:S I can't handle anymore right now. It's rough doing that for the first time. For sure I'm gonna do my legs soon but I have no plans for now to use it under my arms. I think I'll stick with shaving there.;) And, so far, I'm not planning to use it on my ass. And I'm not using it on my balls!!:S Like...eeeek!!!! LOL. That's just too scary! I'll stick with shaving my balls.:) And it really f***ing hurts to use it on my crotch area! I don't know if I wanna keep that up. It depends how fast hair grows back. That is some fairly insane torturous sh*t to epilate your crotch!!!:P LOL. Holy freakin' sh*t! It should be a standard CIA torture method or something. It's pretty wild. In fact, I've been wondering...has anybody ever tried that? Do people do that? Am I doing something I'm not supposed to be doing? LOL. It f***ing really hurts to epilate your crotch!!!!:/
A little more on why I tried this...
Well, guys have a lot of body hair and I just can't stand it! I think it looks gross and it's sooo especially unbearably uncomfortable wearing clothes with all that hair. I totally can't stand it. I started shaving body parts in my teens. I don't remember when I figured out a regular schedule, but I do know, for example, I've been shaving my chest, stomach, crotch and underarms once a week for years and years now. And, when I'm with a girl, I like to snuggle in bed. A lot!:) But my ex would complain the hair on my chest and stomach felt like really coarse sandpaper and it was too rough on her skin. We experimented a bit with either her or me wearing a t-shirt. But she complained the hairs just poke through the shirt. We kinda agreed she could hold me instead (so my back is against her stomach), but she wasn't as much into snuggling as I was. After awhile, we just didn't snuggle much anymore 'cause it bothered her so much. She said I should either let the hair grow out or use an epilator. She had gotten one and said I could use it. Except, by that time, we were about to go on vacation and I didn't want to experiment with some new hair removal thing 'til after we got back. But, not long after we got back, we broke up. And now I finally finally tried an epilator on my chest and I'm so way totally ready to snuggle in bed with someone, please.:) :D
And I've been wondering...does it turn any girls on.......to think about my crotch being epilated smooth?:) Would anyone at all like to see? Feel me? Kiss me there? Lick me? Would any girl think it is totally hot and want me inside her right now?!:P Hee hee hee...
Would anyone wanna feel me and f*** me?:D Can I get my breasts licked and sucked on?:)
As the redness and irritation leaves, my skin feels so comfortable and smooth and has a look I really like.:) I have that smooth sensual erotic slutty feel I want to test out with someone and find out what they think of it.;) Just...oh my God, I totally wanna be felt up and used and fucked really really really good...:)...




October 15, 2007

In The News Today: Bear Attacks Two Hunters In Sweden

Two men were seriously injured after being attacked by a bear yesterday near the town Strömvallen in the middle of Sweden.
The men were getting ready to go deer hunting when their dog came rushing back followed by a bear. Instead of running away, the bear attacked the men who both received large gashes on their backs. The men succeeded in shooting the bear three times. The bear then ran away and was later found dead.
It's only a week ago that a man died after being attacked by a bear in another part of Sweden.

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Uhhh...not a good day...?:P
Actually, it seems like the dog came out of it quite well.:)
Ha ha, maybe the dog was kinda, you know, walking through the woods, came across this bear and said, like, uh, listen, please don't hurt me. Spare me and I'll take you to some real fun, whaddaya say big guy? LOL.
Wow, can you imagine the dog, you know, tongue hanging out, panting excitedly and thinking, like, whew! That was a close one.:P And the doggy gets home and can tell all his (or her) doggy friends!! Man, what a story!!!:D
Or...perhaps the bears had a meeting, like, a week ago and decided you know what, this is OUR forest! We're sick of this sh*t. Time to stand up and take back what's ours! Who's with me?!!:D Yeah, and maybe the dog was in on it. Doggy went out, found a bear and said, listen, got 2 more for ya, come on!!:P
Watch out, 'cause word'll spread. Next all the cows are gonna have a meeting.......(and that's a revolution that won't be pretty;)...




October 3, 2007

In The News Today: 15 Year Old Girl Clears Train Station

Yesterday a 15 year old girl emptied the train station in Århus, Denmark, with a bomb threat.
"There is a bomb at the train station. It goes off at four o'clock. Good luck," was the girl's message to the police.
On the basis of that, there was no choice but to close off the building and search it with bomb sniffing dogs.
The threat was called in using a cell phone on a prepaid phone card. But that didn't stop investigators in finding the 15 year old girl. She has been charged. The police don't yet know the reason for her behavior.

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I'm not sure why but this story totally cracked me up!:P :) :D Hee hee hee...
I guess 'cause I saw the end of a popular teen movie just before I read it. I was imagining some sweet beautiful cute innocent little girl making the call and causing this whole great big extravagant mess like in some kind of family comedy/adventure film.
Like, wOw, totally amazing what you can do with a phone call and a few words.

Okay, let's see...top ten excuses for making that call...

* I was bored.

* I'm rehearsing for the part of a mean girl in the school play.

* I'm writing a report on terrorism. I needed to check the police response time.

* I'm sure the bomb sniffing dogs would like to get out and do something. It's just sad to think of them locked up all the time 'cause there's no bombs to look for.

* I was playing truth or dare with my friends. I picked dare.

* Ordering pizzas for the neighbors was getting old, so...

* I was gonna play a joke on a friend of mine but first I had to find out for sure if the police can trace me if I use a phone card.

* I only had one minute left on my card. I just wanted to use it up before I threw it out.

* Well...I was there and my boyfriend was taking too long in the bathroom. I was so sick of waiting!

* I was thinking of using this to get out of a test at school tomorrow. I didn't study. I just wanted to try out the idea first to be sure it would work.

:P




September 29, 2007

In The News Yesterday: Alcohol Without Hangover

Professor David Nutt at the University of Bristol, England, thinks that he can modify alcohol so it doesn't give a hangover.
The trick is to find the molecule receptors in the brain, GABA-A receptors, that are affected by alcohol and then design alcohol so that it doesn't bind to these molecules.
He is convinced that alcohol can be produced that only has the good qualities that, for example, make people relaxed. Nutt believes also that alcohol related diseases such as cirrhosis of the liver can be removed if one can manipulate the molecules in alcohol.

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So, whaddaya think, could it happen or is he just a nut?:P
I think it's a great idea and I believe it's possible but...quite another question about whether or not any government would approve it.
If anyone is going to work on it, hey, how 'bout doing something with the taste? The first few shots always seem to make my body scream, "This is pure poison! Do not drink this shit!!" So, can we make it taste like water maybe?:D Of course, then...how do you know it's for real? That would be kinda bizarre, having bottles of vodka that look like water and taste like water too. LOL. I'd have a hard time believing it's for real. That would take some time to get used to. Ha ha, kinda like the totally silent vacuum cleaner idea, possible but won't sell 'cause people have such a hard time believing it really does anything.
Well, how 'bout I give you my tips to avoid a hangover? These are things I do and it works for me. First, drink as much juice as alcohol. I prefer juice but I'm sure soda, water or milk would work just as well. And I'm talkin' 'bout doin' shots here. I don't waste my time on beer or wine. That sh*t is just too weak for anything! Next, always have some peppermint oil. Put a few drops in a glass of water and drink it. (I do this before I start drinking or after the first few shots. But it's never too late to drink it.) Seriously, this will save your stomach from potential trouble later. If you forget or your stomach gets messed up anyway, drink the peppermint water.;) And keep fairly accurate track of how much you drink and know pretty much where your limit is. I know from lots of experience, you can only get so high off alcohol. If you chase the high, you won't find it, you'll only get sick. Experiment and find out how much you can drink without getting sick to find your limit. Everyone is different and can handle different amounts. Plus, the limit can change over time. Like, say, 2 years ago, my limit was a half bottle. More than that and I'd be in the danger zone for getting sick. Now I can easily drink a bottle of vodka and I don't get sick.
Another tip, and I really had doubts about this when I first heard it a few years ago but I know from experience it's true! You can't get drunk if you eat spicy food. And I've also found out spicy food will sober you up real fast! Which was quite a bummer when I discovered that one.:S (I had been drinking a lot one day. Had a nice buzz goin' on. Had been out shopping. Hadn't eaten all day. Came home, ate a bag of chili tortilla chips with a jar of hot salsa. Around 10 minutes after that I realized I had absolutely no alcohol buzz at all going on anymore. I had a couple more shots but then remembered it wasn't even worth trying 'cause I just ate spicy food and no matter how much I drink, I won't feel it anyway.) On the bright side, it seems to be guaranteed to save my stomach from any problems. So, I bet it you drank too much and had stomach problems...eat spicy food and that will save you.
You know, I bet it's quite possible to make alcohol that won't give you a hangover, doesn't cause liver damage or other such problems, tastes very mild and is much stronger so you wouldn't have to drink as much to get a buzz off it. I would love it but what I wonder is...would anyone else be interested? I have a feeling what appeals to most people about drinking, besides the buzz, is the danger of it and the horrible taste. You can't show off to anyone by drinking something that doesn't taste bad and can't get you sick. I don't think it would sell. Especially if it's more expensive because of extra costs to produce it! And I don't think any government would approve it and let it be sold in stores because the government won't risk that people would want it and it might become popular. Then too many people would be hooked on it, drinking it, going around breaking the law and getting into accidents and it would just be way too much to handle.
But, hey, listen Mr. Nutt, you nutty professor, if you can make the stuff and sell it at a reasonable price, I'm very interested in it!!!:D Fly on over to my place and drop or, well, actually, carefully lower;) a case or so down a month.:) (And it really does have to be that way. Can't be sent or customs where I live will stop it and add charges and taxes up the wazoo! And that's only if they let me have it, which I'm pretty sure they wouldn't.) Oh, yeah, by the way, as long as you're comin' with that case for me, I need some weed too!;) :) Actually, you know what, there's more. I'll make a monthly list.;) :) :D
(In fact, hey, anyone willing to fly over to my place and lower a case down...let's talk.:) Seriously, customs officials in Denmark are goddamn extortionist m*****f***ers that stop everything and either slap on all kinds of crazy f***in' ridiculous charges and taxes or just plain won't let anything through! So, hey, man, let's do some business!:D Lots and lots of people over here would love to be able to avoid customs, so that'll make it worth the trip.;)




September 19, 2007

What's Your Idea Of Heaven?

I've been thinking lately about how dreams and wishes change. Or do they?
I don't believe in heaven but I've been thinking about how if there really was a heaven, everyone has a different idea of what it would be like and what they'd want. For example, unlike most people, and I do feel strongly and am quite sure about this, I have completely absolutely no interest at all in seeing any relatives. I mean, seriously, good grief, eternity with my relatives?! Like...total BARF!!! That definitely sounds like hell to me! I don't want to see any childhood friends either or ex-girlfriends or, truthfully, anyone I ever met or knew! (And if U B thinkin' "huh?!" and "say what?!!" and if U thinks I B 1 seriously warped freaky dude, well..........fine!:P LOL. B glad you're not me then.;) I haven't experienced true love or loyalty in life. It might be nice to think I could experience that with someone new somewhere else.
And, like, if I were 5 years old, I'd mostly want toys, toys and more toys!:) If I were 10 years old, I'd mostly want wild awesome magic powers and just be able to do whatever I want whenever I want.:) Right now...I mostly want to be alone with thousands of beautiful young girls who love me with all their heart and their greatest pleasure is having sex with me!:P LOL. By the way, definitely need longer orgasms in heaven!:D Since we're talkin' 'bout eternity here, how 'bout orgasms that last days at a time!! Yeah!!!!!!!:D And I want an endless supply of marijuana and any other pills or drugs I feel like having!!:D Even though I've never tried drugs and don't even know what it is to be high, I imagine it must be fun. I guess my idea of heaven is trying and having all the stuff I really really wanted but never had.

Of course, hey, if I can have more, you know, being able to fly and having magic powers and lots and lots of toys still sounds good!!!!:) (Naturally, the kinds of toys I want has changed since I was 5, but, yeah, I still want and lOvE toys!!:)

Hmmm...and this was where I began to wonder..............do dreams and wishes really change? Or do they only evolve and get bigger and more intricate?

Think about it, what's your idea of heaven?
(Hee hee hee, that's right, forget about everyone you care about, forget about work, forget about doing anything important, come on, daydream...:P...LOL...)




September 18, 2007

Smoking Weed Dream :P

Ha ha, I had a dream last night that I finally got to smoke a joint for the very first time.:) I was sitting outside on a bench near a park with this other dude. I think he was supposed to be my friend. He pulls a joint out of his pocket, lights it up, takes a puff and hands it to me asking if I wanna try it. Oh my gosh, I was sooo excited!:D I took it, put the end in my mouth, inhaled nice and slow and deep, held it for a couple of seconds and slowly exhaled. I started to hand it back to him but he gets up telling me to keep it and that he has to be somewhere. Work, I think.
So, I'm sitting on this bench so happily looking at my first joint and thinking, like, wow! This is cool!!:D I take another puff on it. And another. I wonder if maybe I could get high off the few puffs I had. Maybe I should put it out and save the rest for later or tomorrow.
It feels like a few minutes have passed. I'm wondering when it starts to work. I can't feel anything yet. I look down at my obviously hand rolled joint. It's half gone. And it looks so small! Right then, it looks just like a lollipop stick.
I turn it and look at the lit end. Somehow, it looks slightly thicker now. There is an opening. There is something rolled inside of it but...it's still so small and thin! Then I'm thinking that must be what the problem is, it's so small I can't get high off it.
My fingers are holding it too close to the end, apparently. Suddenly, it feels hot, like my fingers were about to burn. I quickly readjusted my grip, looking at it closely, trying to plan how far down I could smoke it. I wasn't really feeling anything from it. I was figuring my only chance at getting high off it was to smoke it as far down as absolutely possible. And I was sooo curious what it would feel like to be high from it.
Then I woke up.
Sigh...

My first thoughts were kind of, ha ha, funny dream. And then...why couldn't I have a sex dream instead?!! I'm not gonna be able to get high in a dream! But if I had a sex dream with wild sexual adventures, at least that would feel real. And then...I was overwhelmed with intense yearning to smoke a joint for real! Oh my God, f***, yes!!! I wanna try it so f***ing bad! Then...I got kinda depressed about not having a clue how or where to get some weed, man.:( I'm soooo dying to try it!!
Sigh...

And right now I'm thinking again about my sex life and that's...so beyond depressing, it's completely inhuman. I really really don't understand how everyone has a sex life and no one on the whole entire earth is interested in me sexually. I just don't get it. It doesn't make any sense to me.
Deep sigh...

Okay...so, who's got what to cheer me up?!:D Come on...:)...




September 17, 2007

I Have A Dream! :o)

My site is not only for entertainment. Thought I'd point that out.;)
My dream is someday...at least one girl on this planet.......somewhere..........would actually be horny for me and want me.:)
Sigh...




September 16, 2007

In The News Today: The Alarm Clock From Hell

Thanks to a Japanese woman, people who have a problem getting up in the morning will now have to check The Yellow Pages to look for that extra half hour of sleep.
After years of finding it difficult to get out of bed in the morning, 27 year old Gauri Nanda has invented the alarm clock called Nanda Clocky. When it rings and you, half asleep, reach over to turn it off, it will roll off screaming all around the bedroom. This means you actually have to get out of bed and catch it to be rid of the noise. In a short time, it's become a big seller in Japan because most people tend to reach out, shut off the alarm clock and go back to sleep.

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Ha ha.:P
I thought I read something like this a few years ago. Anyway, great idea! This is definitely something I could use. I am nOt a morning person!!! Somehow, on work nights, I'm always so very optimistically thinking, hey, 4 hours of sleep is just enough. I'll be fine! And then...I'm basically more than half dead when the alarm clock goes off.
The snooze button is such a great invention, otherwise I'd pretty much never ever be able to get up in the morning but...I can easily go on lazily reaching out and pressing snooze for an hour or hour and a half. Okay, that's if I don't actually have to be somewhere. If I really have to get up to be somewhere...generally, I go on pressing snooze for 40 minutes to an hour. LOL.
I've experimented with different things like...placing my alarm clocks somewhere different every night. Doesn't make any difference though. Set 'em louder. Just makes me turn 'em off faster. Usually, I have 3 alarm clocks placed in different areas of the bedroom. One was, like, 10 years old and stopped working recently so I'm down to two, my bedside radio clock and my cell phone is my second alarm clock. They both have snooze buttons.:D (Which, like I said, is good 'cause without snooze buttons, I'd never get up!) My third alarm clock was a cute lil battery powered radio clock I kept on top of a cabinet away from the bed. Now, you'd think if I had to get out of bed to turn it off, that'd wake my up enough to stay up. But...oh no. I get up like a zombie, wander over to the clock, switch it off, wander back to bed, flop down, pull the covers up and go back to sleep. LOL. (That one had a snooze button but it didn't work any more.) It takes me, like, 40-60 minutes pressing 2 different snooze buttons and somehow then, just barely, I can usually get up. Only if I really have to and only if I go take a shower right away 'cause that's what usually wakes me up enough to stay up.
Hmmmm. A Nandy Clocky would help. Does it have a snooze button? 'Cause if not, I'm sure I'll find it in my over half dead zombie state, turn it off, crawl back into bed, forget about it and fall asleep again. LOL. Hmmm...could be nice as a third alarm clock. I think I need one.;)
And, hey, what did people do in the days before alarm clocks? Maybe they kept a rooster in the room. Or a cuckoo bird! That must've been what people had before someone invented a mechanical cuckoo clock. Or...do you get to just come to work after you get up naturally?:)
You know, I should be able to get a note from my doctor that says I'm physically and mentally dependent on sleep, right? My body fights getting up 'cause I need my sleep! So, can I claim I have, like, some kind of sleeping disability disease or disorder or something! I should be able to stay home, get some rest and collect some kind of fully disabled benefits, right? I really need my rest. Mmm K, well, just, um, yep, keep that money comin' to my bank account, which, by the way, isn't enough and I definitely need lots more, please, and, uh, I'll...try and stay healthy and practice getting some sleep.;) :) :D




September 14, 2007

In The News Today: Parents Should Not Forbid Curse Words

Parents that say "oh no" and "speak properly" when they hear their children curse should be glad instead.
To learn a language, children have to experiment with it and curse words are stimulating accessories that can increase the child's language skills many times over. Or so writes the MetroXpress, a Danish newspaper.
"There's only one reason curse words exist and that's because they are necessary for us," says Kirstine Lindberg Sørensen, who has written especially about childrens' use of naughty and dangerous curse words.

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Like...huh?! (Get the f*** outta here!:P What the holy freakin' f*** U talkin' 'bout?!!)
Parents are supposed to be happy about it...? So...when their children say f*** you or call their mother a nasty bitch or stupid slutty sperm whore, that's supposed to bring joy to mom's ears?
And...I suppose it's okay for dads to teach their four year old sons to say things like, "I want some pussy!" LOL. And..."show me your tits, bitch!!"
Oh, and when the teacher says it's time to do some work or something, I guess it's acceptable that the whole class says, "F*** you, asshole!" Yeah...that oughta bring a smile and wonderful feelings of happiness and pride to any teacher's heart.
I'm so sure every dad is sittin' around now just praying their kids will call them a "dickweed" or "f***ing shithead" or something. Oh, yes, my wonderful kids, I'm so happy and thrilled you're learning English!!!
Oh, gosh, a shining example of just because it's in the news doesn't mean it's true!
Maybe a bunch of rich 10 year olds got their money together, went to the paper and said, like, hey, man, print somethin' that says we can say f*** and sh*t and anything we want and you get all this money.;)
I suppose next there'll be something in the news about how children getting into physical fights increases their motor skills, reflexes and coordination. So, hey, be happy about it!:D :P It's, like, totally necessary for a child's physical development 'n stuff.;)
Yeah, let the kids do whatever they want, whatever they dream up! It shows creativity and it's great for brain development!! Don't forbid anything. Just be happy and let them increase all their natural skills "many times over"!!! Yay!:D :P




September 12, 2007

15 Things A Girl Can Do To Make Me Fall In Love Real Fast :o)

I thought of the first one and somehow that lead to me thinking I should make a list.:P So, here's what I wrote in the order I originally wrote them down....

(and, by the way, this is just totally awesome to have my own site and write whatever freakin' crazy ass thing I want...hee hee...LMAO...)

1. Suck my balls.:D
(Right now, I don't remember a girl doing that for me, but...if a girl would, WOW!!!! I daydream lOts about meeting a girl who would do that. And not just for a few seconds. Get down and dirty and really do it! Do it so I remember it.:) My heart would totally melt. I'd fall in love and be all yours real quick!:D )

2. Show me you're not afraid to put your finger up my ass.:)
(What can I say, it's sexy!:D It's so intimate and so satisfying. It only happened to me once. During sex. I liked it SO much!! It drove me wild both physically and emotionally. It shows you like my body and you love me. It's so satisfying to feel a part of you inside me like that. It makes me happy.:)

3. Okay, okay, here's an easier one, a nice long firm back massage. Especially around my shoulders.:)
(Actually, I need this regularly.;) Please. I really need it. I appreciate it so much and I will not forget. You'll get your massages too, sweetie, don't worry.:)

4. A really good foot massage.
(After awhile, you'll hopefully learn from me what to do 'cause I give foot massages that will blow your mind and make your feet soooo totally hApPy!!;) :) :D )

5. When we're home, walk around nude and just, yeah, hang out nude with me.:D
(This never happened to me before. But I've been daydreaming forever and ever about having a girl who would do that. I've never met a girl who's comfortable enough about her body to just hang out at home nude. If a girl could do this, oh my God, that would be one of my very oldest and biggest fantasies come true.:)

6. Show me you're not afraid at all to masturbate in front of me.:) In fact, don't be afraid to do it often.;) :) :D Usually, I'll start masturbating too and wanna cum all over your pretty lil pussy.:)
(Well...let's see........only one girl I've been with ever masturbated in front of me. It happened a bunch of times, but only in bed and in connection with sex. Like, during sex. And that's fine! Feel free to touch yourself. Do whatever you need to so you can cum. Go for it, sweetheart!
It also happened after sex sometimes. She didn't cum so she started to masturbate. I don't mind! Please, like I said, go for it, do whatever you feel like doing so you can cum. And, holy sh*t, it turns me on!!! Even though I just had an orgasm, I got all horny again real quick! I masturbated with her and squirted over her. Sometimes twice!!:) She teased me a couple times saying it wasn't fair 'cause she only came once and I already came 2 or 3 times. Hee hee.:P
But...what I meant when I first thought of this one was more...outside of bed. Maybe on the couch or outside somewhere or something.:) Just...out of the blue, you could just start masturbating.:) I would really like that, to be so sexually comfortable in a relationship that it's no big deal to masturbate in front of each other anytime we feel like it. I wanna do it for you a lot! And I wanna watch you do it. Mmmmm, I wanna cum on you while you do it. I wanna help you. Let me explore your body and find out how to help you, honey.:)

7. Sleep naked and snuggle with me in bed a lot.:)
(A LOT!!! Please.:) I need this. I need you to be nude and snuggle with me. I will be very upset and it will seriously hurt my feelings very much if this doesn't happen, like, pretty much every night and every morning. So, please...)

8. Suck on my toes.:) And not in a shy or timid way. Hold my foot, caress it, caress my leg, and give all my toes blow jobs.:D :P
(Uh...I don't remember this ever happening before. Well, not all my toes anyway. So, do this and I will fall in love with you pretty much absolutely for sure.:)

9. Climb on top of me in the morning and hump and seriously grind my ass really really good with your wet pussy, kiss my neck and whisper nice things in my ear.:) :D
(Umm...happened to me once. Maybe twice. Mmmmmmm, oh my God! It was sooo beautiful.:) Totally way out rocked my world and made me so so SO f***ing hApPy!!:D )

10. When you hang out nude at home with me and you're sitting somewhere and I come to you all horny, get down on my knees and rub my cock on your sexy leg 'til it's good and hard...tell me you want me to cum on you.:) Tell me to cum on you anywhere I want.:) And if I feel like licking your pussy...you'll let me, wouldn't you?:)
(Well, like I said, no girl I've ever met would just hang out nude at home. I'm constantly daydreaming about it. And...my last girlfriend, a very beautiful girl, never let me lick her pussy.:( I approached her every different way I could think of and she would never ever let me do it. And it was sooo frustrating 'cause never before had I wanted so so much to do it! With all my heart, I wanted to lick her and please her that way but...she......hmmm, how much should I say here. Um...she was raised to believe such things were perverted, she had never seen a real man naked before me, she had never looked at porn, she never even masturbated before, she was so shy about her body and...well, I sure tried but I never never got to lick her pussy.:( :S And, yes, she was over 18!:P )

11. When we hang out at home nude together, don't hesitate to give me a blow job. Frequently!!:D
(Well...one girl from way back when figured out real quick I really appreciate and very much like that sort of thing.:D And she was good at it! The only girl I've ever been with who was good at it, the only one who really had any experience doing it. We never hung out nude except in bed. But she wasn't afraid to touch me or masturbate me or suck my cock. She knew how much I liked it.;) Oh wow, that sure made me very happy!:D :)

12. When we're in public, put your arm around me, lean against me sometimes, hold me, make me feel like you're my girl! Make me feel like I'm your boyfriend and you love me. Make me feel I'm your man and the only one for you.
(Um...well, I've had moments here and there that were nice but, in general, I haven't had much experience with feeling that in public from a girl. I mean...yeah, a lot of holding hands but...I'd so much rather feel your arm around me.:)

13. Put your tongue in my ass.
(Ha ha ha. LOL. No one's ever done it to me before and, okay, I guess I can't expect it. I don't demand it. I really don't think I'd ever complain or ask anyone to do it. I suppose I could live without ever experiencing having my ass licked real nice, but...oh my God, if anyone did that for me, it would sure definitely flood my heart with all kinds of warm mushy feelings for that person!;) :) :D )

14. Fuck me in my ass, please!
(Hee hee hee. Gotta have this on my list, of course.;) No one's ever ever done it to me and...I fantasize and daydream about it every day!
When I get super horny, I think I would let guys do it to me. I would be happy to let guys do it to me on camera too. In fact, if guys do it to me, I very very much want it recorded!:D More than having it done to me, it turns me on to think other people can watch. And I'd love to know what it feels like to have my ass filled with cum, my ass all wet and squishy, feel sperm oozing out and running down the insides of my legs. Mmmmmm. I'm pretty much willing to let anyone fuck my ass.
But it would turn me on most if a girl would do it. I know girls don't have a dick to do it with, so, babe...use a strap-on.:) If you don't have one, I'll buy one! I want so much to be fUcKeD!!! Please. Fuck me in my ass. I'm dying to know what it feels like to be a submissive slut.;) :) If a girl would be happy to fuck my ass...WOW!!!! I'd fall in love with you, hon', real quick.:D )

15. Tell me I'm beautiful and kiss me.:)
(I'd frequently tell my last girlfriend how beautiful she looked. Like, for example, after she got dressed or if I hadn't seen her all day. Sometimes, she'd look at me and say "you're beautiful too" or "you look beautiful too!":) She even told me a few times without me telling her first! That was the best!!!:D I liked it sooo much! And, a few times, I got a kiss too! Holy jeepers, the effect that had on me, the way it made me feel, WOW!!:D
She was the first person that ever used that word for me, the first and only girl who ever told me I'm "beautiful". I never expected a girl to say that to me. Oh my God, I loved it! It really meant a lot to me. I loved it so much!! It made me so happy.:)
So, now, if I have a girlfriend, I need her to tell me that sometimes. I need compliments too, you know! I need to feel appreciated and sexy. I need to feel beautiful just as much as any girl does. So...tell me. And kiss me to let me know you mean it.;) :) :D )




September 9, 2007

All The Great Things About Being A Guy

I made a list of everything I thought of that's great about being a guy...

*It's okay to have really short hair.

And...yep, that's it, the entire list (LOL), the only really good thing I could think of.
Sigh.




September 9, 2007

If The Money Was Good, Would You Do Porn?

Last night, I was previewing a porn clip (one of a few;) I had started downloading from Limewire. A pretty girl walks in an office, sits down and is interviewed by some dude. The girl is 22, from Columbia, single, not working, needs a job and says her English is "so-so" but seems to understand everything fine. The guy tells her what he's looking for are models who will do nude photo work. He says they also make "sex movies" there. The girl asks how much they pay for movies. He says generally anywhere from $1000 to $1500 a day. And she's being very hesitant about it. (And I saw the start of some other clips from the same series today and the dude offers from $1000 for a half day photo shoot up to $3000 a day for movies if the girl will do anything.)
Holy sh*t! My jaw dropped. My eyes lit up. Like, oh my God!!! I'LL do it!!!!:D LOL. I promise to be a good slut and not complain. I'll do everything with a smile. Like...holy freakin' mother of God, I wish I were a girl!! Goddamn, holy shit, yeah, I wanna get paid like that! Sign me up!!!:P
I'm a guy, so I know I'm never gonna get any money for taking my clothes off or having sex. When I think of doing porn, I think of doing it for free.:) I'm usually kind of a dreamer, but I'm also realistic. I know I'm never gonna get any money for it. Hell, I can't even get anyone to fuck me for free. Jeeeeezus holy jeepers, if I could get $1000 a day...WOW!!!:D I'll slobber all over all the dicks you put in front of me. LOL. Mister, you can put your stuff in any hole you please.:P LOL.
Sigh.
Well, I know nobody needs guys for straight porn. A guy would have to have some really close very nice friends in the business to have a shot at that. If a guy gets that extremely unlikely chance to even be in porn at all...it's gonna be for gay porn. Unless a guy brings a girl to do it with. And then, of course, nobody's interested in the guy. The only reason they'll pay is to see her. The girl is the star. She's who everyone wants to see. Girls are sexy. Girls have it all. All you have to do is be female, put a little work into how you look and everyone wants to talk to you and touch you and kiss you and get it on with you. People will pay money just to see you naked! Hee hee. Oh my God. But if you're a guy...what a different story that is. Then, unless you've got money, nobody's interested. Nobody's horny for you. Nobody looks at you on the street and thinks you're hot. No stranger will ever come talk to you with sexual thoughts in mind. If you're a guy, you have to be able to spend lots of money to get sex.
It sucks. (Unless you actually have lots of money, of course.)
Sigh.




September 6, 2007

Girls: Would You Let Me Cum On Your Face?:-P

(You can cum on mine!!:o)

Something I was thinking about today. How come a lot of girls refuse to let a guy cum on their face? In fact, in my experience, very few girls would let a guy cum on their face. Out of the few girlfriends I've had, only one from way way long ago let me do that. (She let me do whatever I wanted. That was hOt.:D ) Two others let me cum in their mouth just a few times but never on their face. My last girlfriend wouldn't do either one. (And, hmmm, now that I think of it, any other relationship I had didn't even last long enough to find out how they felt about it.)
I guess I can understand if it's during the day. Like, it would be a bother to have to wash your face and touch-up your make-up. But...in the morning before putting on make-up or in the afternoon or evening when you know you're not going out anyway, why not then? Is it the humiliation factor? Like...it's somehow disrespectful or something?
I like the humiliation factor! It's sexy.:) I think I would suck dicks and let guys cum on my face. That sort of submissive humiliation factor turns me on. I mean, hell, I'm straight and I'm willing to try it! And someone film it, please! I'll even try having several guys cum on my face (among other things;)!! And I definitely would want that recorded and put on the internet!!!:P :D In fact, I'll only do it if it gets recorded and put on the internet! I want at least a copy to put it out myself! I'd be flattered if a guy wanted to cum on my face. And, like, holy good God, if a girl wanted to jack off over my face, that would be fucking hot!! And if she could squirt when she cums and wanted to do that on my face...like, mmmm, baby, yes!:D Please!! Do it, honey!!!
How come most girls seem to think a guy cumming on their face is gross? Sigh. Isn't it flattering if a guy likes your face so much he wants to have orgasms all over it?:) :D Isn't it good to know it would make a guy so very happy if he could do that? For me, sometimes, I don't think I could be with a girl anymore who wouldn't let me do that. And not just let me, but enjoy it. (It's no fun for me if a girl lets me but actually hates it.) It's one of my very most favorite things ever! (And it's been sooooooo long since I've experienced it. Sniff, sniff.) I love it so very very extremely much and if a girl wasn't interested...well, I'd just never be satisfied. It would hurt me. My feelings would definitely be hurt if my girlfriend just wasn't into that. I mean...I guess I wouldn't actually break up with a girl over it. I never did before. I'd have nothing else going on and having a girl who will do some stuff is better than nothing. But...I'd always feel like there's something very important to me missing. I'd feel like she doesn't love me enough. I'd be upset about it. And I'd be daydreaming about having a girl someday who would like it.
Well, those are my thoughts on it. A girl who not only lets me cum on her face but really likes it would make me vErY happy!:D
Sigh. Now the question is can such a girl be found on this planet or...like, should I be searching other planets?
Ha ha, I guess not even having had a date in over 2 years now is a clue. (Holy freakin' shit, it way f***ing sucks like I don't even know what to be a guy on this planet!:S Girls get all the attention. Sigh.) Okay. Ummm...how do I build a transmitter to get the message out to other planets?
One really healthy sex-starved earthling, um, looking for sexy times with a female from any planet. Send pretty pictures.;)




September 4, 2007

My Top 10 Reasons To Stay Alive

Last night, I was wondering once again why I bother living. Like, barf.:S Sucks when that happens. Anyway, so, I came up with the first few excuses. Then I thought, hey, I'll make a list! I'll write down everything I can think of!!
Then I got stuck. I couldn't think of any more. So, I thought, well, how many is that? I counted them. Ten. Cool!:) Nice round number, so I don't have to come up with any more!!!:D LOL.
And here they are, in the order I first wrote 'em down...

1. To see the next episode of Lost.:) (And, yes, this is seriously, really, my number one thing I look forward to.)

2. To masturbate once more.;) (And, really, if there were no orgasms in life...forget it, I'm outta here!)

3. To try and get high off vodka one more time.:P (Even though I do my best, it doesn't seem to work but...I can try.)

4. To wait 'til I die a natural death so I can say to myself, "See, I never got married. I never had kids. Nobody loves me and life is just work, chores, pay bills and a bunch of other shit you don't feel like doing and then you die!":(

5. Since I've given up hope for sex, to reach my latest goal in life...to try some weed!:P :D I mean, gosh, hey, one of these decades I might actually possibly maybe hopefully please please please get lucky with that.

6. Just to prove I'm never gonna experience what true love is.:S

7. I still have new clothes in my closets I haven't worn yet. I should at least get around to wearing everything once, right?

8. To finally get those boots I've been wanting for so so long and wear 'em a couple times.

9. To find out at what age my hair turns all gray and I get so many wrinkles I hate looking in the mirror. (Okay, this one, like nr.4 and nr.6, not fun, nothing to look forward to, but I was just plain crazy desperate for something to write down and now that I consider it...they should, of course, really be at the end of my list!)

10. To finish my Buffy Quotes project. (I started compiling my favorite quotes for each season of Buffy The Vampire Slayer.:) I only got up through season 3. I was planning to finish that. (See last year's blog for that...if U B int'rested. Although, hmmm, yeah, it sure seems to be only me that gives a hoot.)

Hmmm, now that'd be a trip seeing what other people would write as their Top 10 Reasons To Stay Alive.
Try it! Write down 10 reasons why you bother to stay alive and see how your list compares to mine. LOL. Good holy freakin' God, that oughta be funny.:P ('Cause I'm obviously such a pathetic freak. Like, oh my God...)
Ha ha! I like my blog. It makes me laugh.:D
LOL.




September 2, 2007

Saw An Interview With Taylor Rain

My thoughts today...
When it comes to porn, I believe Taylor Rain is the most gorgeous wonderful sexy thing ever! As well as being breathtakingly beautiful, she is undeniably incredibly talented at doing porn. She is wildly fascinating and completely absolutely out of this world truly amazing. She has, quite some time ago, announced her retirement from actually being in porn movies, although, as far as I know, she still does it. Just not at all as many as before.:P And she is still wildly popular! In fact, I only first discovered the joys of watching Taylor Rain earlier this year.
However, the more I find out about her and her personal life, the less infatuated I am. It's surely another case on a long list of me just plain being attracted to the wrong kind of girl. I mean, what the hell is wrong with me that I constantly seem to have eyes for beautiful extremely social party girls. A relationship, even casual, would just never work. Anyway...
I saw an almost 11 minute long interview with Taylor Rain on YouTube today. Fascinating. And slightly shocking. She was high. No surprise. As far as I know, it'd be quite a rare occurence to not see her high. Still...it's a recorded interview. Wouldn't you want to be completely aware and in control of what you say on camera? Honesty is cool. And she was. Not pretending to be someone you're not is cool but...wow. Nothing she said offended me personally, but being too honest on camera can turn off fans. Being too relaxed gives the impression you don't care, which can also turn off fans. Seeing that interview has certainly lowered my opinion of her, although I still believe she's the most awesome thing ever in porn!!!
It's the way she looks, simply her beauty that makes me think anything of her at all. She looks like a Goddess! Forget all the top models you ever heard of, this girl totally freakin' blows them all off the planet, if you ask me. If she didn't look like that, I wouldn't be interested. And after seeing that interview, I would think of her as nothing but some silly girl who got fame and fortune for sucking dicks and letting guys do her in the ass on camera. She's so beautiful though, there's prob'ly nothing she could do to make me not like her. I feel kinda guilty for writing the harshest thoughts I've ever had about her here right now.
I'm disappointed, that's what it is. Besides one interview from very early in her career, this is the only other interview I've seen with her that lasts more than a few minutes and I was hoping so so very much she was a girl of more substance. And the getting high...was...just because of the way she looks, kind of endearing, kind of cute really. But now...I don't know. I can understand why in a way. If you have the money, why not? Why not have a good time. Even if it is every day. So what, right? But........if someone wants to go on and on every day, month after month, year after year getting high...there's something wrong. A person must be trying to escape. A person's life must be too unsatisfying and too painful to wanna get high every single day. It's a problem if getting high counts more than anything else and for her it obviously does.
Just because she looks the way she does, I'm still interested. I still care. In fact, I'm worried for her. It kinda breaks my heart to see she can't be on camera, can't be anywhere without being high. Sometimes, I think I would like to be her friend. I would like to talk to her away from her usual crowd, away from any cameras, just one on one. I don't know what would come of that, if anything. Prob'ly nothin'. Actually, I'm pretty sure it would just end up with her getting ME high.:P Which I'm totally sure I'd enjoy very much!!!:D LOL. I'm...disappointed but I still care is all I'm sayin'. And, although I feel a little disappointed, I don't mean to say she's doing anything wrong. After all, in general, I still believe everyone should have the freedom to live their life as they choose. Hell, if I looked like that, I might very well be just like her. I'd much rather be her than me, that's for sure.
And...Good Lord, I need a life!:P Rambling on about someone I'll never ever meet, someone who will never know I even exist, someone I prob'ly couldn't get along with and wouldn't really want any sort of relationship with anyway ('cause of all the guys she's done stuff with and all the guys she still does stuff with). I needs, like, oh my God, a real girl I can talk with.;) LOL.
Sigh.




August 24, 2007

My Site Ranking This Week

I got my weekly report today on where my site ranks compared to all the other Wetpaint sites.
Oh my God, I thought I was nervous last week about seeing where I am. Jeez. That was nothin' compared to this week. Usually, I don't even think about it, but this week, yeah, I've been curious and wondering.

Well, last week, I was number 54 out of 513,535 Wetpaint sites.

And, this week, as of yesterday, August 23rd..........(drum roll, please;)...
49 out of 518,848 Wetpaint sites!

Hee hee.:D Cool!:) It's been a dream of mine to crack the magic top 50.;) Ha ha. I did it!!!!:D

Of course, me and my greedy thoughts...I've wondered if I could get in the top 10. That would be even more awesome. Although possibly impossible. Anyway...I'm very very totally hApPy about my ranking this week.:)




August 24, 2007

Poppy Seed Tea

Have you ever tried it?
Last month, I was all excited after reading about poppy seed tea and morning glory tea on the internet.:P I did hours of research to be sure this was really worth trying. And finding recipes. Several people mentioned feeling sick and throwing up after drinking morning glory tea, so...I was mostly interested in poppy seeds!;) But...yeah, I was still interested in trying both.:)
While I was out shopping, I checked some gardening centers for the seeds. Nobody has 'em. But they're not illegal here (in Denmark). Then I remembered something in the news a couple of years ago about how one major chain of stores removed all the seeds off the shelves 'cause people were buyin' 'em to get high. So, I'm guessing that's why the other gardening places I checked don't have 'em either. Sigh. Back to my computer again to research where I can order them from and who has the best prices. I checked eBay first. Lots of seeds there!:) But anything sent to me from outside the E.U. can be stopped by customs here and then I could be charged taxes and extra charges. I looked and looked and finally found one (and only one!) gardening store in Denmark that I can order the seeds from and that was the cheapest place too. Okay, so got that figured out. Checked the recipes again. F***!!!
It's just way too f***ing expensive! According to the info I've found, it takes hundreds of grams of seeds to make one pot of tea. That would cost, at the very least, $100 to get that many seeds. And I just totally don't see how one pot of tea could be better or last as long as $100 of vodka. I can't even imagine one pot of tea being as good as $50 of vodka. Shit, shit, shit. Sigh.
Like.......am I ever gonna manage to get high?!!
F***, shit, piss. And what a bummer.




August 20, 2007

3 Billion Live For Less Than $2 A Day

I saw a bit of a documentary series yesterday about globilizering. The most interesting thing to me was they mentioned a statistic saying there are 6 billion people on earth and 3 billion live for less than $2 a day.
Wow. Well, it's sure nice to in the upper half, isn't it?!!:) I think that's what I needed, a reminder that whatever problems I have, my life isn't too bad. I have a nice apartment, plenty to eat, lots of clothes, a TV, a computer and other nice things. Suddenly, what I was worried about lately seems kinda trivial.
Every so often, like every few months or so, my TV acts up and...how shall I describe it, it flickers or clicks or sometimes even sparks a bit in the back. And then text TV won't work or I have to wait a half hour or more 'til the TV warms up so I can use text TV. I usually check out the text TV news every day.
Last week, something different happened. For a few days, the screen would kinda violently flutter, sort of make a loud flashing or popping sound. Everything would go away and come back real quick a few times after I turned it on. Like turning on an old florescent tube, it flutters before warming up and staying on. And I thought, oh no, this is it. Any time now, I'll try and turn on the TV and it won't work. Or it'll just make one last pop and be dead. Then what?
I'm broke. I have a bunch of extra bills coming up for the next 2 months.
I pictured myself living without a TV for awhile. But, no. That won't work. I gotta have a TV!! No matter how many weeks or months I wait, my financial situation isn't gonna get wildly better. So, then I imagined trying to get it fixed. Yeah, and they'll tell me it's the picture tube and it'll cost who knows how many hundreds of dollars to get a new tube. And in that case, it makes more sense to get a new TV.
But if I get a new TV...I want one at least as big as the one I have now. I have a 28". But, damn, I can't afford a new TV. I knew this would happen though. It can't last forever. It's an old Nokia picture tube TV. 11 years old now. (An ex-girlfriend, the one I moved here for, bought it used. She left it to me when she moved.) I'm prob'ly lucky it lasted this long. But, shit, I'm still paying off the loan for my computer. If I take another loan for a TV now, I'm definitely gonna feel that every f***in' month. It's not gonna be fun.:S
So, I started researching prices on TV's and where stuff is on sale right now. Well, there are some nice sales going on this week and prices aren't nearly as bad as I dreaded. I saw one, the same size as what I have now. It's an old picture tube one though. Generic brand. But only about $300. The next best deal I found is an LCD screen one, the same generic brand, with a 32" screen for about $800, which is totally wildly cheap for where I live. (For example, another great deal I saw was a Sony LCD 32" on sale for $1000.) Hmmm. Either way, I'd still have to take a loan. I was really scared I'd have to do it.
Then I start thinking, like, come on, $300. It's not that much! Where can I get $300? Um......well..........uh................hmmmmm. Like, damn, girls always have a way out. They can sell their body and come up with cash if they had to. If I were a girl, I could be do a porn video or be a prostitute and get a new TV quick!!:P And I wouldn't stop there. There's lots of stuff I want!!! But...sigh.......I'm not a girl...
Yesterday and today though, my TV as been fine. Hmmm. So, maybe, hopefully (please, please, please!), I don't have to get a new TV just yet. I really really hope my TV lasts 'til I get my computer loan paid off. Then it wouldn't be such a disaster to get another loan.
Of course, like, jeeez, 3 billion people live for under $2 a day! Even if I had to get a loan right now, my life could be worse! Even if I had to borrow money, I'll still have my nice apartment, a TV, a computer, my clothes, food and everything else.:) My life's not so bad. I'd survive.;)




August 19, 2007

Things Women Are Turned On By vs. Things Men Are Turned On By

I made this list months ago after seeing a bit of a Robbie Williams concert on TV. Lots of girls all over the world seem to be crazy about him. But I don't get it. I was watching this dude trying to figure out why girls would think he's sexy. He's not showing off his body. He seems short to me. Small. Not particularly good-looking. His clothes aren't anything special. It certainly can't be his hair. So, why do millions of girls go crazy for this guy??! And why do girls think any guy is sexy for that matter? They obviously don't judge by the same things guys judge by. So, I started making a list of what I believe most girls look for and what most guys look for...

Things Women Are Turned On By:
Confidence, money, fame/a man that most people look up to, energetic, definitely not shy/very good in social situations, smiles a lot, bright eyes, a man that takes control, a man that's never scared in any situation, a man that is independent/doesn't need help with anything, someone she can really talk to and tell her problems to and will just listen to her.
And when it comes to sex, a man who won't hesitate to touch her, feel her up, slowly try and get as far as he can towards sex with her and always trying, always interested, even though sometimes she won't let him go all the way.

Women's Main Thought/Goal:
Relationship with someone that would impress all her friends.

Things Men Are Turned On By:
Bare skin, pretty face with make-up, breasts, legs, beautiful long hair, nice clothes, nice nails, asks for help/needs help with things, not overly confident, a little indecisive, a little shy, someone he doesn't have to tell his problems to, someone who doesn't ask too many questions, responds with smiles and affection when he does something nice for her.
When it comes to sex: submissive, gives in to his advances, lets him go for it whenever, smiles, enjoys it, happy about it.

Men's Main Thought/Goal:
Sex.

Although I have some male characteristics, examples of things I worry about and spend my time on:
My nails, my hair (okay, yeah, it's short and basically easy to take care of but...I do trim it once a week), clothes, my skin/shaving, shopping, cooking, keeping everything clean and neat. But women don't even care about that stuff, do they? They're just not looking for the same things guys look for are they?
I used to show a lot of skin in my late teens and early 20's.:P (Had a perfect body back then too.) But that never ever, not even once, seemed to get me any attention from girls. Darn.:( And I've always been shy. I really think I should've been born a girl!! I know how to be a girl.:P Wow...and then I could wear skirts and show off my legs and go completely nuts with make-up and nail polish and jewelry!!!:D Oh my God, I totally should have been a girl!:) I could have everything I ever wanted...like a sex-life!! Yay!!! And children. And a house...sigh...




August 19, 2007

My Blog

Sometimes I wonder...is it better to keep everything a mystery? Maybe the more you know about a person, the less you identify with that person, the less you think you have in common and therefore the less interesting he or she is...?
Ha ha, maybe I should delete my blog and let it all be a mystery.:P Would I have more fans that way? Hee hee...
Or...maybe it's all a good thing. Maybe it's just, like, totally fascinating to read someone else's thoughts. My thoughts in particular.:) Maybe it's great entertainment.:) Or maybe someone looks and thinks, like, whew, I thought I was crazy but I'm not. He's kinda crazy though!:P Or...maybe someone thinks, aha, see, I think about that stuff too. And then someone knows they're not alone. Or.......maybe no one's ever even seen this blog and...I'm just kinda here hangin' out, entertaining myself and laughing at my own thoughts...
LOL. --See!:D
Yeah, well, if nothing else, I entertain myself and get myself to laugh.:P :) :D




August 18, 2007
Today, I'll answer the following question...

Have You Ever Taken Drugs?

No.
Is that strange? I think it's very rare you can meet someone who's never tried anything. Nope. I've never tried pot. I've never tried any pills (excluding anything that had to do with surgery). Never. Growing up, I believed everything they taught us in school about drugs (and alcohol). Even a little bit can cause permanent damage, they said. And I stayed away from people that would take drugs or smoke or drink. It kinda scared me and I thought anyone who would do that stuff was a total idiot. I was sUcH a geek back in my school days! LOL. Plus, I didn't like the thought of not being in control. I felt too much was out of my control already. I wouldn't voluntarily give up any amount of control over my body or my mind. But...that was then. And this is now.;)
Now, although I've still never tried anything, I'm completely open to the idea. Hell, more than open to it. I wanna try everything!:P Now my view on the whole thing is life is short, who cares, I just wanna have some fun before I die. But damn...I don't know anyone who takes anything or even know someone who knows someone who has something. Shit.:S Sigh. LOL.
On top of that, I live in Denmark and...here, even cold and flu medicines are illegal. I'm not kidding. Seriously. All those shelves of medicines you see in supermarkets in U.S.A. do not exist in Denmark. There is no medicine section in Danish supermarkets. Even a whole lot of health supplements are illegal. And the vitamins and supplements that are legal are so outrageously over-priced that not many people use them. It's extremely difficult to get vitamins and health supplements approved to be sold in Denmark. There's only a very tiny tiny vitamin section in the supermarkets and you're lucky if there's two or three different brands of anything.
I got in trouble once for ordering vitamins from U.S.A. I didn't know it was not permitted. The government confiscated my package. I wasn't allowed to have it (even though all that was in it was vitamins). And they basically told me I'm in deep shit if I ever try that again.:S
And...there are no weight loss pills. That's illegal. Can you imagine...NONE of those pills you can get in U.S.A. for weight loss exists here. Years ago, with a doctor's prescription, there were one, maybe two types of pills. But not anymore. All that is illegal now.
Here, you have to go to the pharmacy and ask for it just to get aspirin! Here, you need a doctor's prescription just to get hemorroid cream!! (Ha ha. Which I did once 'cause I read in some magazines how some stars and models use it around the eyes and I was curious. I wanted to try it. So, I had to go to the doctor, lie about why I wanted it and get a prescription. LOL. Yeah, so, I tried it. It didn't do anything. Some weak ass junk. I'm totally sure it's not at all the same stuff/as strong as what you can get in an American supermarket.) Even with a doctor's prescription, there are no cold and flu medicines like in U.S.A. Like I said, that stuff is illegal! It is possible to get some things at the pharmacy for a cold or flu if you ask, but...there is no real medicine in them. They're useless. And as far as getting valium or vicodin or something like that...ha ha, no way! (I've tried!:P ) Some of those kinds of things exist but it's pretty much impossible to get a prescription for anything like that. Doctors here say anyone who takes it WILL get addicted. So, they simply will not write a precription. (And, of course, it's illegal to buy it over the internet from anywhere.)
So...ummm, pssst, listen.......what can U get me?:D LOL. Got any marijuana for sale?:) Like, seriously, I need someone in U.S.A. (or somewhere!) I can have pills sent to, who can then rewrap it and send them to me in a plain package and mark it as something else so hopefully customs here won't check it. Come on! LOL. Please!!! Even if you're only willing to send me some vitamins.:) (God, you wouldn't believe the prices here! It's totally crazy!!) I'll pay ya back for the postage.:) How 'bout an extra $10 for your trouble. Help. Sigh. Please...:)...
As for drinking, yeah, I got drunk for the first time at a party when I was about 20. Didn't try it regularly 'til a few years ago. And I don't drink beer or wine. Come on, it tastes gross and I can't get drunk off that weak junk. I luvs me vodka!:) Straight up. Shots! Shots!! Shots!!!:D Even with vodka, it takes a lot to get anywhere. I always have to plan it so I can drink on an empty stomach. If I eat, I don't really feel it. And I haven't met anyone that outdrinks me. (And I've been to Belarus! My last girlfriend came from there. We visited for 3 weeks one summer. They drink like Russians over there. That's where I learned to drink it straight. Before that I used to mix it with orange soda. Anyway, everytime, after the vodka was gone, I still wanted more but...everyone else was satisfied and there just wasn't anymore left. Bummer.) These days, I can usually go through a whole bottle without even getting sick. Or very high. Sigh. I wanna try some pills!!! Vodka alone doesn't do it anymore. I wanna get totally f***in' out of mind wasted! Oh f***, hell, yeah, I wanna get totally high!!:P LOL. Whatcha got? Ecstasy? Ooo, baby, yes! Gimme, gimme.:P I wanna try it!!!!:D Marijuana? Yes, please, I'm dying to try that. Come on, eVeRyOnE else has tried that. I wanna try it!!!! And...valium. And xanax. And vicodin. I wanna mellow out and relax.;)
Got any coke?:P It's not one of the relaxing things, so I wouldn't pay for it, but, yeah, if someone gave me some...sure, I'll try it. I've heard booze and coke go good together. (Hmmm, seems reasonable. Maybe one can get high without getting too sleepy.;)
So, what else is good? LOL.
And, by the way, now that I discovered vodka is nice party water...it's so freakin' expensive here!! Like, there was something in the news a few weeks ago that said Denmark is the 10th most expensive country on earth to buy alcohol. And...Denmark has the highest food prices in all of Europe. (Which prob'ly means the whole world as well.) Sigh.
I've been thinkin' I have to learn how to make my own moonshine.:P ;) :D Hey, who can teach me how to do that?!:P LOL. And, hey, man, how easy is it to grow weed? Where can I get some to grow it? LOL.
Sigh.
Good grief, I never made any deals with anyone to enter the priesthood. Deep sigh...


(Added note: Well...in thinking about and just now reading over what I wrote, this seems to be all about getting high. Which, okay, yeah, I intended it to be when I wrote it. But it's not only about that. Everyone has their problems to deal with. No one is perfect and problem free. I wanted what I wrote to be just fun and entertaining but...to be completely honest, it mostly has to do with sometimes I have problems with anxiety. That's how I can, for example, drink a half or even up to a whole bottle of vodka on an empty stomach and no one can even see that I drank anything. That's the truth. It just helps me relax. I've never in my life done anything bizarre or wild or crazy because of alcohol. I can still be at work, go shopping, do whatever I need to do. But, don't worry, I've never ever driven a car after drinking any alcohol! I don't even have a car right now. It's a small town I live in and I just ride my bike.:) I desperately need something strong just sometimes to help me relax and be at least sort of normal. That's mostly what my interest in pills and weed is about. Of course, I'm not backing down and saying I don't wanna get high. I do!!:P Everything I wrote is true.
I don't think I've ever been high. What is it to be high?? Is there anything that can even get me high?! I'm sooo curious...)




August 17, 2007

My Site Ranking

Here are examples of the weekly report I get on how my site ranks compared to all the other sites at Wetpaint...

June 29, 2007: 3,693 out of 452,408 Wetpaint sites.
Well, could be worse. I was hoping I could move up. In fact, I was pretty sure I would.

July 5, 2007: 3,697 out of 462,445 Wetpaint sites.
Oh, no! Moving down already?! I was bummed out about that.

July 13, 2007: 3,746 out of 474,260 Wetpaint sites.
Sh*t!! I was thinkin', well, I guess nobody's really interested in my site. I'll prob'ly always be ranked in the three thousand range. Just not what most people wanna see. (Of course, if I were a girl, I bet my site would shoot up to number one real quick. Ha ha.)

July 20, 2007: 2,241 out of 483,791 Wetpaint sites.
Yeeessss!!:D Progress. Cool!
I was happy.:)

July 26, 2007: 1304 out of 490,521 Wetpaint sites.
Oh my God!:D I was hoping I'd move up, but I didn't imagine at all it'd be that far in one week. Totally awesome!! Okay, cool, maybe I'm on the right track here. Maybe some people really do like my site.

August 2, 2007: 473 out of 498,843 Wetpaint sites.
Holy freakin' sh*t, man! Movin' on up!! Luvs it!!!!:D Definitely on the right track. Got somethin' good goin' on.;) Hell, yeah!!!:D

August 9, 2007: 104 out of 507,000 Wetpaint sites.
I'm shocked. Like, are you kidding me?! Of course, I hoped, I dreamed, but I wasn't expecting that! Wow!!
Can I get any higher? Hee hee hee...

August 16, 2007: 54 out of 513,535 Wetpaint sites.
Seriously?! LOL. Wow!!!! I'm ecstatic! Oh my God!! Whoever's looking, ThAnKs!!!:)

But also wondering...like, could I have done that myself? Like, maybe I've been around so much lately updating and making new pages that I moved myself up...? Could that happen? Maybe nobody's looking. Maybe it's all me. It can't be just me, can it? I don't know what to think. I hope so much some people somewhere out there like my site.:) LOL.




August 17, 2007
Another bit of extra profile info I was thinking of adding. But, see, some of these have such a long explanation. It's much better as a blog entry. So, anyway, I'll answer the following question...

Since you're shaved "down there", does that mean you want your girl shaved too...?

Not necessarily. It doesn't really matter to me. Well taken care of is all I expect.
It's very very sexy if I'm shaved and smooth but the girl I'm with has hair.:) I really like that. It's so erotic. So sexy! It turns me on!! Mmm, I love to watch myself slide into her and feel her hair against my smooth skin. If feels sooo good!!! So beautiful. I cum so good and hard.:D I love it.:)
Of course, if a girl wants to shave, I don't have a problem with that at all.:) I shave. I could certainly understand why someone else would wanna shave.;) It's very inviting towards oral sex!:P Being shaved kinda seems to say, here I am, everything's available for ya anytime, sweetie. LOL. That's partly why I shave. I'm totally freakin' begging to be touched, kissed, licked, sucked on. Oh my God, yes, do whatever to me, please!!!:P :D So, yeah, I'd have to say, I'd touch a girl more down there and kiss and lick more if she's shaved. It's just such nice clean easy inviting access.:)
I've seen pictures of girls with a nice bush down there and it looks absolutely amazing! Perfect!! I'm already imagining what a powerful orgasm I could have feeling her hair against my bare smooth crotch.:) I've also seen plenty of pictures of shaved girls with a pussy that looks sooo soft and smooth and wildly freakin' gorgeous.:) Wow, makes me wanna lick it for days.:P So...shaved or not so much, it can be extremely sexy either way!:)

And as long as we're on the subject of shaving, I do have preferences concerning other parts of the body. Like, I think a girl should shave her legs. The entire leg! Not just up to the knee. As I remember at the moment, all the girls I've been with (which isn't many!) shaved only from ankle to knee (claiming shaving only makes the hair grow thicker, so they didn't seem to have any plans to ever start shaving above the knee.)
And underarms. Male or female, underarm hair is gross! One girl I was with (a Danish girl) didn't start shaving under her arms 'til after we met. (Sigh. My luck with girls is way beyond bad, I tells ya...)
Hmmm, now that I think of it, I can't remember ever being with a girl that shaved her ass. Sigh. I never said anything about this to anyone ever before but...you know, it just doesn't feel right that I shave my ass and none of the girls I've been with ever shaved theirs. So, hmmm, that's something I'd like to experience...a girl that shaves her ass.:) That would be a way exciting new experience for me!:D
Ha ha. LOL. I mean, come on, girls! Jeez. Contact me.;) I think I'm pretty easy to impress. There is a girl somewhere out there who shaves her legs...isn't there...? Please, please, don't tell me that's only some fantasy thing on the internet! (I'll cry...and go drown myself in the toilet. LOL.)

Oh, and so as not to leave the guys out (if any guys read this far...?), I think guys look much more attractive shaved. I've still never done anything with a guy and I'm not saying I wouldn't do anything with a guy that didn't shave anything but...in general, too much body hair grosses me out. I've never seen a picture of a hairy guy and thought, like, wow, that's hot! LOL. But I have seen pictures of guys' crotches that were shaved which made me think, like, hmmmm...;)...

And now this seems to need some kind of end, so...uh.....ummm..........well..................whether you're female, male, shaved or not, I'm sitting here naked typing this right now. Someone please come f*** me!!!:P That B whut I want.;)





August 16, 2007
There are a few things I had in mind to talk about. A few things I started writing up on paper several weeks ago. At first, I was thinking of adding it as profile info. But...it's all kind of secondary stuff. It's not that important. Then I had this idea to start up a second profile page. But...my thoughts might change about some of the stuff I was planning to get into. Finally, I thought the best way to do it would be as entries in a blog. Then I thought of all my blog stuff from 2005 and 2006 and how freakin' cool it would be to get all that over here too. If you really wanna know more about what goes on in my head...it's way worth checking out.:) And I sometimes miss having a regular blog. So...that's how I decided to start up this blog here. (Don't know if anyone will read it! LOL. But, hey, man, I could use my imagination and pretend my blog is, like, way totally popular 'n stuff.;)
Anyway, one of those sort of secondary things I wanted to do was make a list of my favorite actresses. So, yep, here it B...

My Favorite Actresses

Okay, so looks are more important to me than talent. So what.:P I like to look at something pretty.:) The end result is...watching them moves me, it touches me, it entertains me...(and holy good God, these are some way hot sexy babes!;)...

And, okay, well, waaay too difficult to get these names in exact order, but, yeah, kind of slightly possibly almost in order maybe sort of. (My biggest surprise in making this list is how far down Sarah Michelle Gellar is. The last I saw of her was The Grudge 1 and 2. Good movies but her character...I don't know, just wasn't sexy or funny or very interesting.) Here it goes, my current list as of today and, of course, there's loads more actresses that I like but I really tried to keep this list to a minimum...(and I may be back occasionally, the rest of the year, to rearrange the order until or if I make a new list at some point)...

Michelle Trachtenberg, Evangeline Lilly, Kirsten Dunst, Mia Kirshner, Kate Beckinsale, Jennifer Garner, Mischa Barton, Jessica Biel, Angelina Jolie, Jennifer Connelly, Scarlett Johansson, Jessica Alba, Sarah Wayne Callies, Amanda Bynes, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Sandra Bullock, Brittany Murphy, Cameron Diaz, Lauren Graham, Natalie Portman, Willa Holland, Taylor Cole, Halle Berry, Vanessa Marcil.

Now that I made a favorite actresses list, it seems I should make a fav actors list too. There aren't really any guys I'm very excited about. Sometimes, I really like certain characters but...I wouldn't say there are any actors I'm totally wild about like some of the actresses. If I had to make a list...

Kevin Spacey, Wentworth Miller, Nicolas Cage, Bill Murray, Tom Hanks, Robin Williams, Wesley Snipes, Jim Carrey, Denzel Washington, Billy Bob Thornton, Matthew Fox, Keanu Reeves.




May, 2007
This was something I wrote and was going to add to the same blog I posted the last thing, from March, but just never got around to it. That's why I don't have an exact date for when I wrote this, but I'm pretty sure it was in May.

So You Think You Can Dance: Allison

They started showing season 2 of So You Think You Can Dance here in Denmark a couple of months ago. It's just finishing up now. (Most weeks they showed 2 episodes.) It's a great show and I have a lot I could say about it and many of the dancers, but I'll keep this post focused on my favorite dancer this season, Allison Holker.

This week, I got up to the episode before Allison gets sent home. I have it on tape. I'm a little behind. Then I happened to see the beginning of the following episode, which I had just started recording 'cause I was about to workout. I watched the opening dance number, kinda curious who got cut. And...Allison wasn't there!:( I was absolutely completely out of my mind shocked!!:o I couldn't understand at all what happened. I love her. Oh my God, she's sooo beautiful and dances so amazingly well in ANY style! She's one of the very best dancers I've ever seen!!! In fact, she's my favorite dancer on earth right now!!!! I thought it was extremely likely she'd win.

I started looking on the internet that night. Mostly, I wanted to find an address to write to her. I would really love to express to her how much watching her dance has touched me. It's been such a wonderful beautiful heavenly thing to see her dance! It's meant so much to me!! I have tears in my eyes writing this. And...well, I think she would enjoy reading a letter or e-mail from me. I looked for over an hour and couldn't find an address.:S (Well...except for a MySpace address/profile which may or may not be really her. And if I write there, that means I have to start a MySpace profile. If I did that, I'd want to do it right and that would take way too much time and work to do that. Sigh.) However, I did see plenty of other people were outraged, confused and bewildered as to why she was cut. Quite a large number of people felt she should've won.

The next morning I watched the episode before she gets cut, the one where America voted afterwards. I was feeling such despair knowing what would happen in the following episode. Just as I never imagined she'd be the next girl to get cut, I didn't imagine I'd find any answers as to why. But...watching that episode, I think I found it. I think I have an answer. I think I know why. And it has nothing to do with her dancing. There really seemed to be something going on between her and Ivan. As much as I like her and as irrational as it may be...I must admit......it was upsetting to catch glimpses of how much she likes him and how much he cares for her. It upset me enough and made me lose interest enough that I wouldn't have voted for her on voting night that time...even though I think so much of her and want her to win. So, if you ask me, I'm pretty sure that's what happened, her feelings for Ivan upset the male fans and she didn't get the votes she deserved.

Anyway...just a little somethin' to let it be known I love Allison!:) If I believe in something strong enough, I'm not afraid to say it. And I believe in Allison. She is way out totally freakin' talented and unbelievably freakin' awesome!! (Completely off the wall sexy too!!;) It was great privilege and honor to see her dance and she touched my heart in a way I will never forget...







March 11, 2007
I still hadn't started this site up, so this was something I originally posted somewhere else.

During the first months of 2007, I was busy trying out different places, totally tired of how other sites have so many rules about what you're allowed or not allowed to talk about, getting kicked out of places because of my videos, just trying to find a new homesite where I could have a profile, pictures, my videos, my blog and everyone could see it all for free.:) It was a very frustrating time.:S Finally, I got so f***ing pissed off and sick of everyone else's rules, I decided somehow, some way or other, I had to have my own site!! I didn't have time to write much, so this was my first post for 2007...and I guess maybe my melancholy mood about finding a new homesite shows just a little here...

The O.C.: Marissa Died

Any O.C. fans?

Yeah, I guess for everyone reading this, Marissa's death is ancient news by now. Well, I live in Denmark. They show a lot of American shows here but they're all at least a few months behind compared to U.S.A. And that's a major breakthrough compared to several years ago where most of the American shows were generally about 2 years behind. Anyway, yep, I saw the episode last week where she died. And this week they showed the next episode where it skips ahead 5 months.

I had sort of stumbled across the news about her death on the internet months ago. I knew it was coming. I didn't know when. It was still shocking. Devastating. I'm still in mourning. But I was brave. I didn't cry...like the second time (or was that the third time? LOL) Buffy died on Buffy The Vampire Slayer. You know, the one where she jumps off the tower into that vortex thing.;) Yeah, that got to me. I cried mostly for Dawn. It was so unbearable to think how lost she felt and how much she was hurting. And, by the way, yes, STILL mourning and upset over the Buffy series ending. That was truly the best thing on TV eVeR!!!!!!!:D
It doesn't look like any of the characters on The O.C. got any counselling. I think I may need grief counselling though. Sigh. Marissa...one of the most beautiful sexy characters ever on screen! And now she's dead.:( I loved her.:) Sigh. So often, you just don't realize how much you love someone 'til they're gone.:(

I remember the moment that song came on..."Running Up That Hill" by Placebo. That blew me away. God, that song captured the mood sooo perfectly. Best song they ever played on that series. It was intense. And in the back of my mind, I was thinking, that song!!! Holy sh*t! What is that song??!!! Luckily, I was watching it on tape. I rewinded 3 times just to hear that song. I wrote some of the lyrics down and figured I could find it on the net and get it quick off Limewire. (Checking the lyrics, I found out it's a cover of an old Kate Bush song. I didn't think much of the original but I like the Placebo version!) And, yep, a couple days later I got the song. Wow, back from 2003. I thought for sure I found all the good stuff that old. How could I miss this one. (I found an Infusion remix of the original that's pretty good too.)
I listened to it about 10 times that night during my run. I about had to force myself to wait and listen to a few other songs first. Then last night I was running and listened to that song through half my run. About 8 times. Mostly, I was thinking about the characters on the show, how sad and intense things are, what they all would be feeling.

On the surface, at first, I thought Ryan was acting like an idiot. But...if I put myself in his place, thinking what if it were me...suddenly all his actions make sense. The song expresses his grief so well. It expresses mine too. Also, some of the other characters on the show. Oh my God, poor Summer!!:(

By the end of last night I was thinking, yeah, if I could, I'd change places, I'd be running up that hill to save Marissa. I don't know her but her life was rich and full. She had her whole future ahead of her. So many people cared about her. Nobody would miss me. Like the song goes, I'd make a deal with God and take her place if I could.
Ha ha, yeah, this is my life. At the moment, it seems the only people that mean something to me are fictional characters on TV. I've never had a real person in my life I loved so much I'd die for them. But characters like Marissa...Buffy...Dawn......they don't know me but if they were real, I'd die for them.

Still occasionally wondering why Mischa Barton is out of the show. Haven't looked around about that on the internet yet. She could've got kicked off, I suppose. But I don't think so. I imagine her contract was up and she was tired of doing the show. I'm sure she has offers to do movies. (Or, hey...if I dare tell you some other thoughts I have......like..........maybe she quit to marry me! Yeah, that's it. Hee hee hee.:D Somehow she found out about me and doesn't know yet how much I like her. So, she's busy planning how to conquer my heart, of course.;) Ha ha. I'm sUcH a dreamer!!!:P )
Well, to end on a good note...Marissa's sister, played by Willa Holland.....looove her! Looking forward to seeing more of her. I'm kinda doubtful the series will last long after Marissa's death, but I'm pretty sure I'll keep watching every single episode 'til it ends.:)









The main pages for this website can be found at the top left side of the screen written in blue. If you click on the main page titles, some of them expand and will list more pages.
To make this really easy, I'll list all the pages here at the bottom also, with links, and you can click on them from here if you like.:)

Julian's Blog: 2008

Julian's Blog: 2006

Julian's Blog: 2005

My Sex Fantasy Blog

My Profile Page

My First Webcam Videos

My Camcorder Videos: page 1

My Camcorder Videos: page 2

My Camcorder Videos: page 3

My Camcorder Videos: page 4

My Pictures

Pictures From My First Webcam Videos

Pictures From My Camcorder Videos: page 1

Pictures From My Camcorder Videos: page 2

The Blue Pictures

Bedtime Stories For Lovers